We've been moving furniture at our house, and I'm amazed at how new everything seems though all we did was shift our Craigslist and Ikea stuff by a few feet.
Moving furniture is actually good marriage advice, according to psychologist and marriage-researcher Michele Weiner-Davis, in her book "Divorce-Busting."
Change anything, Weiner-Davis says. Can't seem to end a long argument? Change the location of where you're fighting. Feeling bored? Change up how you spend your time together, trying something new.
As an illustration, she offers a story from Gregory Bateson, anthropologist and husband of Margaret Mead. Bateson was once asked to observe some otters at a zoo. Normally quite playful, the zookeepers were concerned because the otters had grown listless.
After several days of watching the otters inactivity, Bateson (out of desperation) tried dangling a paper on a long string into their area. Immediately the otters started playing.
The lesson here is obvious: they were bored. Change anything - it doesn't have to be a big fix - and life suddenly looks a little different.
Use It Now: Change something in your relationship. Sleep in something other than that old softball team t-shirt; try a new restaurant; trade household chores; paint the kitchen.
No comments:
Post a Comment